Learn how to be a better listener with these 5 tips

Being a great listener is a significant part of personal growth and development. It can enhance the quality of the relationships in your everyday life. Imagine being able to quickly gain keen understanding of another person’s ideas. This will help you in making better decisions, learn new concepts and save time by avoiding any confusion.

Most importantly, being a great listener will help you know what someone really wants or needs. With this knowledge you will have the power to succeed in satisfying the important people in your business and personal life.

Of course, becoming a great listener will take some time. Here are some tips that you can use everyday to practice effective listening:

1. Look, nod and lean

Being a great listener involves communicating to the speaker with your body language. Having the correct body language will give the proper Read more

Stress Relief Tip: Drink a cup of green tea

Sometimes when I feel stressed out, it seems as though things are going by so fast and that there are so many moving thoughts floating around in my head. When this happens a great stress relief tip that I like to do is: brew and drink a cup of green tea.

For the past few years I have been drinking green tea on regular basis. About 3 to 5 cups per week and usually a little bit more during the winter months. I used to be a big coffee drinker, but have gradually switched to tea.

I find that green tea has less caffeine than coffee and is better soothing to calm any stressful nerves. Here are some reasons why green tea can be an effective stress reliever:

It helps you switch gears

Making tea involves you to really take your fast paced life and ease it to a slower, more relaxed tempo. For example, Read more

5 Situations that can reveal your true colors

Everyone tries to show their best character and wants to be seen as a “nice” person. However, we are all eventually faced with certain situations that bring out our “true colors” and it can change the perceptions people have of you.

I’m not saying that we shouldn’t express our feelings. But by recognizing these situations you can learn to uncover a person’s true personality, and gauge whether they are sincere.

Most importantly, by acknowledging these situations you can learn to manage your own behavior and learn if you are really the person you stand for.

Here are 5 situations that reveal someone’s “true colors” and shed a light on what a person is really like:

1. While Traveling
Whether for work or pleasure, traveling can truly be a bonding experience and bring people closer together. You will get to know your traveling companions on a more personal level, and its wonderful. However, you have to realize that Read more

Understanding personal development by involving yourself

“Tell me, and I will forget…

Show me, and I might remember…

Involve me, and I will understand.”

This is an old Chinese proverb that you might also have heard of before.

Obviously, it’s a very straight forward translation and the meaning is really apparent. The quote essentially says that the best way for someone to make you truly understand what they mean is to make you a part of it.

The other day I saw this quote again and it got me thinking. This quote is great to make someone else understand, but how can we apply it to make ourselves understand? How can I apply this approach to increase my learning and growth in personal development?

I would like to analyze the quote to show the different levels of learning in personal development and how WE should involve ourselves to gain the most effective understanding on change.

Tell me and I will forget …

This is the discovering stage, where we read personal development books (and blogs!) about how we should change. It’s a very significant part because it enlightens us to new ideas. However, most people will take in these ideas and never implement them. It may be that these personal development ideas are the best and have proven to be successful for many people. But if it only goes as far as listening and reading about it, then there is no real change. The ideas will fade and be forgotten if they are never used.

Show me, and I might remember.. .

This is the knowledge stage, where you actually see how personal development ideas are applied. There are countless illustrations, plans, manuals, outlines, and charts that visualizes how someone has done something… effectively. These give you a clear picture of how an idea CAN work. You now have the steps and guidelines for change. However, the keyword in the quote is “might remember”, meaning that you still depend on the illustrated document to better understand the concept or idea. You know the concept but it has not become a part of you, it’s still on paper.

Involve me and I will understand…

This is the experience stage, the most important part of personal development. Change is really just a learning experience. And for this experience to happen… you need to take action. Plain and simple! Engaging yourself to implement the personal development ideas will force you to understand. You will make mistakes and you will learn. You will make the right decisions and you will learn. The point is that there is no substitute for experience, it’s the best way to learn, change and understand.

A True Hero, Dad Competes in Marathons for Disabled Son

This has to be one of the most inspirational stories I have ever heard. After watching this video I was left speechless. I think Dick Hoyt has to be one of the greatest dads in the world. I think this story can serve as an inspiration to everyone. It really reinforces the fact that drive, passion, belief and perseverance are elements needed to being successful in anything you set out to do. This story will always touch me and I often recall video for powerful inspiration in everything I do and want to succeed in. Hope it inspires you too.

This story really shows the unconditional love Dick Hoyt has for his son. He is driven to give his son the same experience other people have, no matter how much he has to endure. I think its amazing that Dick has ran over 950 races while literally “supporting” his son in each race. Keep in mind that Dick is 66 years old and still competes in marathons, which is truly remarkable.

Dick and Rick Hoyt are also known as Team Hoyt and their motto is “Yes You Can” which is very fitting for how they have gone above and beyond to achieve things that are truly legendary. They are a perfect example of how anything is possible.

I think the most more astounding part of this story is that his son Rick has responded positively to overcome the obstacles. Although Rick is disabled he is able to live a fulfilling live and was able to go through high school, graduate from college and lives in his own apartment. He is living proof that disability does not have to hold anyone back, Rick states, “I’ve shown disabled people that they don’t have to sit back and watch the world go by let life pass them by, they can go to school, get a job and be included in everyday life”

This story has touched so many people and has made so many believers in that anything is possible. Dick Hoyt is considered a hero to numerous people, and when asked how he feels about this, Dick Hoyt simply says, “I just love my family and want to be the best father I can be”.

You survived a layoff in your company, what to do next to keep your job safe: 7 tips

Company layoffs and downsizing are a part of business; it’s the easiest way for a company to cut expenses and stay alive. It’s unfortunate for those who do get cut, but if you are an employee who remains after job cuts, you better be cautious. You might feel relieved and simply go on with your workday routine. However, the days after a downswing event should really be a time of careful planning and reflection about your career.

1. Notice the change
After a company lays off its employees, there will be other changes to cut the budget. For example when there are fewer employees, your workload will increase. Of course, since the company is struggling financially, they cannot Read more

Stress Relief Tip: Avoid confrontation and write a letter to yourself

Sometimes you will find yourself in a very frustrating situation where you know that telling someone what you REALLY think will just cause more problems. I find that this happens typically when in a disagreement with a family member or a co-worker. Let’s face it, we all have to deal with people that are just plain stubborn and it is not worth the time to argue with them. Essentially, the best way to deal with this, is to avoid the confrontation completely. However, by holding your frustrations within you is just going to stress yourself out; which is not a good thing either.

A trick to help you triumph over this frustration is to sit down and write a letter to yourself. This might sound unusual, but address the letter to you. Write down everything you feel. Do not hold anything back. Go into great detail and explain the situation as you see it. Write about how unfair the situation is and how you truly think the other persons viewpoint is completely wrong. Make a very big deal about it.

Then after you are finished writing, tear it up and throw it out.

The letter has functioned properly by giving you an outlet. After writing this letter to yourself you will experience a feeling of immense relief. More importantly, you will have prevented a confrontation with a co-worker or a family member that could have turned out to be a bigger headache. The letter will drain out your emotions and you won’t feel compelled to tell someone. Sometimes, it will be necessary to write the letter again or maybe even a third time. After this you will realize that you don’t want to think about it anymore, much less talk about it.

An important thing to remember is to actually write the letter down with a pen and paper. In today’s tech savvy world it might be easier to type it up on your computer, in turn, it will also be easier to just click the delete button. By writing it down with a pen and paper, it will give you a more tangible experience and makes the act of tearing the letter up a more effective release.

How to easily start a conversation with new people: 5 tips

Do you have trouble starting conversations when meeting new people? Is it because you are shy? Or are you just simply worried about not having something really interesting to say? I used to have this problem, but after years of observation I was able to uncover 5 useful tips that makes starting conversations super easy.

1. Don’t try to be perfect
The main reason why people find it difficult to start conversations with new people is because they are afraid to be dull and boring. It is natural for you to want to make a good impression and have the desire to say something really interesting. However, if you start talking to a stranger by saying something extremely profound, you will appear very unnatural and create an even worse impression (that you are crazy). The fact is that you need to establish a natural flow of conversation in order to say something interesting. You need to take the pressure off and realize that a start of a conversation is just simply a “start” and does not require anything spectacular.

2. Realize “small talk” is supposed to be trite (overused phrase)
When you meet someone new, you will be saying things that are going to be trite. And this is OK. Just as with getting a starting point as mentioned above, you will need to get the conversation moving by saying things that help each person engage each other. Some common trite sayings are: “it is a beautiful day out, isn’t it”, “this sure is a nice place”, “what a great [insert event] this is”, or “how about them [local popular sports team]” etc.. As you can see, these phrases are always used and they are necessary to build up the conversation. From this point you can transition the conversation from a start to another level.

3. Accept and prepare for the “warm-up” period
Be willing to go through this period in starting a conversation. The warm-up period is when you actually will find out the specifics of each other. This information is very important but at the same time can also be tedious. The warm-up period will generally consist of learning each other’s name, occupation, where they live or whether they have kids etc. If you accept that this is going to be part of starting a conversation, you can then prepare yourself to go through this period. You are probably thinking that this is obvious and it is. However, I have met plenty of people that get nervous when they have to talk about their job and it makes talking to them really awkward. It would be good idea to practice talking about your job. This will help build your confidence and really help you and anyone you just met feel more comfortable.

4. Get the other person to talk about themselves
Whenever you meet someone new and can’t think of a single thing to say, the best thing is to ask questions. Everyone will respond to a question, they are not going to just sit there and NOT answer. Even if you get a few short answers from them, eventually you will ask a question that will spark some conversation. Of course, its best to start off with the common questions above. But when the conversation seems to be slowing down you can refer to one of the previous questions and expand on it. For example, if the other person previously said that he works for a certain company X, you can say “you mentioned you worked for company X, what got you into this industry? Where did you work before?” The point is that when you keep the other person talking the more opportunities to generate more interesting conversation.

5. The more the better
The more people you meet the better you will get, it’s really that simple. I have learned that you don’t become great a conversationalist overnight or after one great conversation. It’s going to be a rough experience, at first, but you have to approach each conversation as a learning experience and to practice your skills. Be conscious of each time you meet somebody new and each time exercise one of the tips: use trite transitional phrases, acknowledge the warm up period and get the other person talking etc. Over time, meeting and talking to new people will come easier and hopefully more fun. Good luck!

Increase Motivation with a Visual Reminder

Often when people work towards their goals it can be difficult to consistently stay motivated. The ability of being able to push yourself day-to-day can make the difference in achieving success. Although there are tons of ways to increase your motivation, one of the more simple and effective ways is to create a visual reminder. These reminders can consist of photographs, a posters, and symbols. Here are some tips to ensure that your visual reminder is effective as can be.

1. Be Realistic
Make it as realistic as possible. Select a photograph or image that will visualize exactly how you think it will be when you’ve achieved it. For example, if you are working towards getting the finances to travel. Don’t put an image of money, dollar sign or a stack of cash. Instead select an image of what you will be doing when you get the necessary funds. If you plan to go on a vacation to Europe then put a picture of a how you envision yourself in your destination city. A picture of a café scene or a famous landmark of that city would be ideal because you can actually experience being in that location.

2. Evoke emotion
Okay, so now you have selected several pictures that show how you visualize yourself in achieving that goal. The next step is to select the images that will evoke strong emotions. This is something that will be hard to describe since ultimately you will be the one who will feel it. The point is, if the image makes you instantly feel inspired or passionate about your goal, then its a good image… Does it make you want to immediately take action towards your goal? Do you immediately re-focus and concentrate on what needs to be done? If yes, then the image you select will be more effective. A rule of thumb is if you have to spend more than 2 seconds looking at the image to feel something then its NOT a good visual reminder.

3. Display the image constantly and prominently
A visual reminder should be displayed somewhere you can see it daily if not hourly. This is to ensure that you are creating focus and drive. The more you see a visual reminder the more it will re-focus you and will lead to less distractions in the long run. Its also important to have the visual reminder in a places that are prominent. You want to avoid places where the visual reminder can blend in or get overlooked. It’s better to have it stick out, that it essentially commands you to take notice. Also, make sure to put this visual reminder in a couple of different places, such as one at your office desk and one at home.

Some examples of prominent places to put your visual reminder:

Bathroom mirror - Tape a picture to your home bathroom mirror, each time you brush your teeth you will be forced to look at the image. Its also great because since you brush in the morning and at night before bed, you will create a focused start and refocused ending of your day

The corner of your computer monitor - While some people like to put images on their monitor’s desktop wallpaper, it think its best to print out a small copy of that image. Tape it to the upper corner of your computer monitor. It will be more prominent than on the wallpaper background since it wont get overlooked while you are actually using the computer. Also its tangible, meaning that the you can touch the picture and it takes up “real” space.

Next to your kitchen table - It is common for people to put visual reminders in the kitchen and usually these end up on the refrigerator door. But how often do we stand in front of the refrigerator with its door closed? I don’t know about you but I usually have it opened and focused on looking for food. I think its best to put the visual reminder in a place where you actually see it, such as a wall next to your kitchen table. This will ensure that when you are eating can notice the picture. Instead of eating and staring at the wall, why not re-focus on your desired goal?

Inspiring Video: Autistic Basketball Player Achieves Greatness

This video truly captures the emotions of a very inspirational story. It’s about an autistic boy named Jason who is very devoted to his high school basketball team by helping players in practice sessions and distributing water. Because of Jason’s dedication and enthusiasm, the basketball coach allowed him to suit up for a game so he can “feel what it’s like to wear a jersey”, but to everyone’s surprise, the coach actually let Jason play. What happened next was truly remarkable….

Although born with autism, Jason did not let this hinder his dreams. I think we can all learn a lot from Jason. By having the passion, determination and belief in yourself, you can overcome normally difficult obstacles to achieve extraordinary success.